St. Mary's

THE CHRISTIAN GOSPEL IN A NUTSHELL

Cross and Resurrection

Andrew Sillis
Vicar - St Mary’s Church, Cuddington, Worcester Park

Why I believe God is calling me to go to Long Ditton

Last week in her sermon Mother Lucy Clare said 'This new year holds challenges for each of us, there will be calls to action and as those who are one in Christ, how will we respond?' l had a challenge last year when I received a letter from Bishop Ian, the Bishop of Dorking, asking if I would consider a move to St.Mary's, Long Ditton. Not to move house, but to move ministry. The reason being that at Long Ditton there is just one priest, Vicki Burrows, Vicki is the Rector (Vicar) and she desperately needs ministerial support to help her with all that's happening there, including a large number of baptisms, weddings and funerals.

The request was a great shock, as it came out of the blue. I stood for a few moments absolutely still, going hot and cold. Then there were tears at the thought of no longer being a Curate here in this church. I have so many good friends here; I love working with Andrew, Christine and Helen, and with many others of you as we seek to give glory to God through inviting Jesus to live in us day by day. I am excited about exploring new patterns of worship, and fulfilling dreams through developing the healing ministry here. And I am blessed by living in the heart of the parish and - as I am out and about - meeting the people to whom, and with whom, I am ministering.

So I had a challenge and a call to action - a big decision to make. How would I respond? For me the overriding and deciding factor was whether God is calling me to make the move. But what did He want? How would I discover His will? I have heard no 'voice' speaking out loud, but I believe from the depths of my being that moving my ministry to Long Ditton is God's calling for me at this time. Otherwise I would not have the strength to leave you all.

I want to share with you briefly my journey of discernment, because at some time or other each one of us is likely to have to consider the question 'What does God want me to do in this situation?' whether the decision is a big one or a small one. There were two questions to which I was seeking an answer 'Was it God's will for me to move my ministry from here and go somewhere else?' and, if the answer to that question was 'yes', 'Where was that ministry to be?'

God's timing was spot on: the day I received Bishop Ian's request I was due to meet my spiritual director. But even before our meeting a book I had ordered arrived 'An Altar in the World.' Inside I read words to the effect that sometimes if we don't face the challenge of a move, we miss out on discovering new gifts we didn't know we had, and on meeting new people. That was spot on too! I asked God for a Bible verse: I was given Luke 4 verse 42. Let me read it to you. 'Jesus said [to the crowds] "I must proclaim the good news of the kingdom of God to the other cities also."' I shared this with Andrew, whom I had told the day after I received the letter and he commented 'Maybe God is calling you to leave Cuddington, but how do you know 'the other city' is Long Ditton. His suggestion was that I should choose the top two areas of ministry I'd like to be responsible for and see what Vicki offered.

To find out the answer I needed to meet Vicki, so I wrote back to Bishop Ian, to say that I was prepared to take the process a step further. I had a chat with her on the phone and met her and during our meeting she offered me responsibility for the two areas of ministry that I'd put as my top two. I explained I had been exploring prison ministry and said I would like to continue to make that part of my job description, which Vicki immediately accepted. I said to God I'd like to know what Vicki felt about sharing ministry with me, and without any prompting in our next telephone conversation she said she'd look forward to working with me. The feeling was mutual.

In my head I knew from the beginning that from the viewpoint of the 'whole body of Christ' it made sense for me to make the move. Why should we have such a large team at Cuddington while Long Ditton coped only at great personal cost? Gradually God prepared my heart to leave here. I was amazed at how quickly my sense of loss lessened and a new feeling of excitement grew alongside. At the Advent Quiet Day Margaret Marsh included a poem about 'letting go'; various sentences in things I read confirmed that God was calling me to something new and in her sermon at the beginning of December Helen's sermon included the challenge that 'Much is required of them to whom much is given.' which I took on a personal level. And I had dream, which I remembered when I woke up: I was at St.Mary's, Long Ditton and everyone was very friendly. There was a very positive feel about it and it seemed significant to me as I don't normally remember my dreams………………………….

Just before Christmas I met with Julian Henderson and at that meeting decided my answer was 'yes'. It was quite poignant that on the Sunday before my sermon had been in part about Mary's 'yes' to God. Today, in her sermon, Christine challenged us about being obedient to God and saying our 'yes'. I believe that in making the move to Long Ditton, I am being obedient and saying my 'yes' to God. Easter Day is going to be bitter sweet for me, but early on I knew I wanted to journey with you through another Lent, Holy Week and Easter. Another 'door' which opened so easily for me! And Easter Day is all about new beginnings! I shall be sad to leave, but as I share ministry with Vicki, I shall have more opportunity to preach and preside, and to take baptisms, weddings and funerals, all of which I enjoy and find fulfilling. The team here is still really strong. As well as Andrew, Christine, Helen and Linda, Jason will be licensed as a local licensed minister (aka Reader) on 18th July. And each one of you has gifts. Using some words from the prayer for the martyr Abbot Moses 'May God spur us on to give our all in that adventure which alone is crowned with glory.'

Sue Ayling
17th January 2010